Lily Tomlin — 'Just remember, we're all in this alone.'

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. 

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific. 

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest - then we can all die laughing.

The road to success is always under construction.


Why is it that when we talk to God we’re said to be praying, but when God talks to us we’re schizophrenic?

Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past...